


a place she feels safe in

by ifthebookdoesntsell



Category: The Prom (2020), The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anxiety, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Sharing Clothes, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 00:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29941959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifthebookdoesntsell/pseuds/ifthebookdoesntsell
Summary: The thought makes a fresh wave of nauseousness run through her. She doesn’t want to cry. It makes her feel small-- she only ever really cries about her parents-- so she does her best to swallow the saltiness welling in the back of her throat.Then, she does the only other thing that makes sense.She grabs her pen from the nightstand.Emma?She prints it as neatly as she can-- though her hand is shaking-- on the inside of her wrist, knowing her soulmate is most sensitive there, will most likely feel it.(Or, the one where they're soulmates, and Alyssa needs some comfort.)
Relationships: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan
Comments: 11
Kudos: 49





	a place she feels safe in

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JulietInConverse](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JulietInConverse/gifts).



> hey y'all! hope everyone is doing good. this is a little idea that's been sitting around in my head for a little while. 
> 
> this fic is for @julietinconverse! jess, happy birthday! i love you, and i really hope that you like this. 
> 
> (thanks to @adohug and @musicals-musicals for beta reading :) )
> 
> (title from if you love her by forest blakk)

The house is quiet. 

Her mom is on a business trip for the next few days, and while Alyssa is glad for the peace, she could definitely do without the silence that comes along with it. 

There’s some kind of curse about being supremely good at being alone. 

It’s why Alyssa has been staring at the ceiling for the last twenty-five minutes, lungs burning and cool all at once as her throat tightens as she hugs her knees up to her chest for some semblance of touch. 

It’s finals’ season, and the rational part of her knows that she’s probably the most prepared student in almost all her classes. That doesn’t stop her mother’s words about duty, responsibility, and expectation from bouncing around in her head. 

Helplessly, she gasps for a breath, fingers clenching in the fabric of her sweatpants as she tries not to cry. 

Alyssa hates crying. 

The thought makes a fresh wave of nauseousness run through her. She doesn’t want to cry. It makes her feel small-- she only ever really cries about her parents-- so she does her best to swallow the saltiness welling in the back of her throat.

Then, she does the only other thing that makes sense. 

She grabs her pen from the nightstand. 

_ Emma?  _

She prints it as neatly as she can-- though her hand is shaking-- on the inside of her wrist, knowing her soulmate is most sensitive there, will most likely feel it. 

Emma has told her multiple times that if she’s ever feeling anxious she can always do this, but this is the first time in a few months that it’s been so bad that Alyssa has had to finally cave and use their connection. 

Her heart already settles slightly when she feels the gentle scratch of an invisible pen on her skin just below her own letters. The message is rather long, and Alyssa can’t help but smile as she reads it. 

Her soulmate writes just how she talks. It calms her even more, imagining Emma’s voice in her ear. 

_ Hi! Are you okay? You do know it’s 3am, right? That’s early even for you, Greene.  _

Alyssa sniffles around a laugh, but her whole body is still shivering. She can’t manage to correspond much else back, aside from a single word: 

_ Anxious.  _

The answer is immediate: 

_ Oh. I’m sorry, love. What can I do?  _

A fresh bout of tears wells up in Alyssa’s eyes at that. It always floors her how much Emma cares; how even after her bedtime, even after what was likely a long day, she’s willing to give anything she can. She trembles, going to write something else, but she’s shaking so hard it’s difficult. 

Emma must sense that something is wrong, because just below her question, words begin to appear on her skin once more. 

_ I’m on my way.  _

Alyssa coughs at that, wrinkling her nose when she feels the mucus that’s built up in the back of her throat. She tries to wipe her eyes with her sweatshirt -- the sleeves are a bit too long since it’s technically Emma’s hoodie that she stole -- but it just smears mucus across the fabric. 

Irrationally, it makes more rough, unpleasant coolness rush through her. 

It’s all piling on, now. 

Weakly, Alyssa tries another one of the breathing exercises, trying to focus on the colors of the many books on her shelf, on the feel of her pajama pants against her legs. 

She takes a deep breath, lifting her wrist when she feels the gentle itch on her skin again. 

_ It’s okay. You’re okay.  _

Alyssa stares at the words, repeating them in her head. It steadies the rhythm of her heart slightly. She squeezes her eyes shut, doing her best to banish her panic with the mantra, envisions Emma whispering it to her. 

_ You’re okay.  _

***

Alyssa hears Emma before she sees her. 

She snorts quietly that Emma has always been a heavy-footed, and the patter of footsteps on the stairs outside her room alerts her to the fact that her girlfriend must have used the key under the mat to get in, rightfully assuming that Alyssa is in no state to answer the door. 

Emma finally sweeps into the room, bundled in a hoodie, a jacket, and a beanie, and already, it makes Alyssa let out an easier breath. 

“Hey,” Emma murmurs softly, wandering forward slightly. “Can I touch you?”

Alyssa nods immediately, barely waiting for the girl to sit beside her on the bed before she throws herself against her, burying her face in her shoulder. 

“You’re okay,” Emma whispers into her hair, holding her close and rubbing her back. Alyssa whines around a few hiccuped breaths, suddenly enveloped by the comforting scent of lavender, vanilla, and the kind of love that soulmates only reserve for each other. 

Emma hushes her, the silence between them only broken by the sound of a pen clicking open. Alyssa is confused for a moment, especially when the hand that was walking over her spine stills completely, but then, there’s suddenly patterns appearing on the back of her hand, the consistent, unseen scratching of a pen familiar in its pressure.   


Emma never writes or draws too hard. It’s one of the things Alyssa loves about her; Emma is gentle in everything she does, soft and assuring. She’s never purposefully rough, never does anything to hurt her. 

Alyssa smiles softly when she feels Emma finish drawing musical staff lines and then recognizes notes taking shape. 

They do this often when one of them isn’t feeling well. Emma always draws music notes, and Alyssa tends to go with hearts, stars, or, occasionally, the opening lines of one of Emma’s songs if she wants to make the other girl laugh. 

Snuggling closer, Alyssa noses at Emma’s neck, her anxieties melting away the longer Emma holds her; she always feels safe in her grasp. 

“I’m sorry I made you get up,” she mumbles, finally breaking the quiet. “You didn’t have to.”

“Of course I did,” Emma replies, lifting her pen from her skin and clicking it closed now that Alyssa is feeling a little better. “You needed me.”

“I love you,” Alyssa says automatically at that, absently placing more of her weight on Emma, giggling quietly when Emma suddenly yelps and they tip over backwards, Alyssa still on top. 

“I love you too,” the blonde laughs as she looks up at Alyssa, their eyes soft as they meet. “I’m serious, though. Don’t apologize. I’m happy that you wrote.” Her gaze is wide, innocent and loving. “I always want to help.” 

Alyssa kisses her at that. 

Emma hums, smiling softly and reciprocating for a moment before they pull back to stare at each other once more. Alyssa’s eyes move over Emma’s face, finding comfort in every familiar edge and curve. 

Her beanie is slightly off center on her head since they accidentally fell over, and it makes Alyssa light up further as she watches Emma spark with her own realization. 

“Is that my hoodie?”

Alyssa blushes. “Yeah. Sorry, I kind of got it dirty.” She gestures to the sleeve that has dried snot on it and the collar which is rumpled and slightly tear soaked. 

“That’s okay,” Emma tells her quietly, kissing the tip of her nose. She grins at her, a little crooked and so, so attractive. “Nothing a washing machine can’t fix.”

“It’s funny you think you’re ever getting this back,” Alyssa teases. 

“Alyssa,” Emma whines, fake pouting, though they both know she loves it when her girlfriend steals her clothes. 

“Finders keepers,” the brunette replies, biting her lip around a smile. 

“Fine,” Emma grumbles. “Just take better care of it than you have been, got it?” She laughs. 

“Promise,” Alyssa agrees without any fight. She shifts so that their legs are tangled, the easiness of it sending any last thoughts of worry out of her head. 

Emma smiles. “Good.” She rubs her back a few more times, appreciating the way the sweatshirt is way too big for Alyssa now that she’s realized its hers. She spies the way it hits mid-thigh, the way the fabric bunches over slim shoulders and she still manages to have sweater paws. 

It makes warmth spread through her, makes her realize that even if Alyssa Greene wasn’t her soulmate she would have fallen in love with her at first sight, with every breath, would have found out a way to rig the system so they could be each other’s. 

“What?” Alyssa asks shyly. 

“Nothing,” Emma assures. She wanders her hand up until she can tangle a hand in Alyssa hair, rubbing at the base of her scalp. She smiles when she feels the girl shiver and relax against her. “So you feel better?”

“A lot better.” Alyssa nods. “I don’t know what happened. I just got a text from my mom telling me about how she wants me to get As, and then I started overthinking--”

Emma hushes her gently, trying to remain quiet about her anger toward her soulmate’s mother. It isn’t what Alyssa needs from her right now. 

“It’s okay. We don’t have to talk about it anymore.” She knows that the girl will sometimes rework herself into a spiral, and it’s already been a hard night. 

Alyssa deserves rest. 

Seemingly in agreement, the girl hums, exhausted from her bout of panic and anxiety. Emma smiles when she feels a cold nose pressing against the spot right under her ear.

She laughs. “Do you want to go back to sleep?”

“Only if you’ll stay.” Alyssa says it so quiet, barely breathing the words against Emma’s neck. 

Emma isn’t one to refuse such an offer. She loves having a sleepy, pretty Alyssa in her arms. She tightens her grip around her, maneuvering them so she can curl around her girlfriend and they’re both on their sides. 

“I would love to stay,” she whispers, reaching over with her free hand to take off her glasses and blindly placing them on the nightstand that she knows is right beside her head. She brushes her lips against the back of Alyssa’s neck, promising at barely a murmur: “And when we get up, we can get waffles.” Emma’s heart settles comfortably in her chest when she feels Alyssa relax against her further. She likes knowing the girl feels safe enough to do so. “How does that sound?”

“Sounds perfect,” Alyssa says quietly, smiling. She already sounds like she’s about to drift off. “Thank you again for coming over. I really love you for it.”

Emma nods gently. “You don’t have to thank me. My girl needed me,” she murmurs, kissing Alyssa’s shoulder, smiling when she spies a tiny blush beginning to tint soft skin. “And I love you too.” 

Alyssa cuddles further against her. “You make bad nights better,” she admits shyly. 

“So do you,” Emma whispers, ease washing over her as Alyssa nuzzles against her arm as she begins to fall asleep. “So do you, love.” 

**Author's Note:**

> hey there! thanks for reading! what did you think? if you enjoyed, consider leaving me a comment/kudo down below. it would make me smile :)
> 
> jess, i love you a lot, and i hope that you enjoyed! happy birthday, ml 
> 
> as always, you can find me @ifthebookdoesntsell on tumblr. my askbox is always open for whatever is on your mind.
> 
> be safe out there x


End file.
